Air on a G string. ...

“I don’t, give a uck. Bridge! I am not, kissing some bloody frog!”  The guy, climbing into the frog costume, was glaring at them. “He can hear you Sars!”

“Good! So long as he, gets the message, loud and clear! He puts one of those bloody, what the hell do they call them anyway Bridge!”

“Legs. Don’t the French cook them and eat them Sars.” “Uggh gross!” “Apparently, Toren’s said they taste like chicken.” Sars threw down the brush, turned to stare at her. “To think I thought my day could not get any worse! When did you see HIM?”

“Stop stressing. Weeks ago. You were in the Drim center in Brum. Remember I said I was going to post those letters? Well on the way I bumped into Toren’s. He had just come from that music store with some gear in his hands.

Don’t know what it was but he asked me if I wanted to join him for a coffee. Costa’s was just around the corner and I was thinking to myself, I was thirsty; so I did.”

“Well you, never mentioned it! “ “If I had you would be just like you are now! Paranoid again! We really don’t want to go through the other day again!” “Ucking winds me up Bridge!” “Oh and you don’t wind him up!” “Ucking deserves it Bridge.”

SARAH KISSING THE FROG OR NOT ?

Sars looked over at the guy, now, with the head of the frog; in his hands. “What are you ucking looking at?” He stepped back, shook his head and sat down. A couple of others joined him.

“What’s, with the cussing all the time Sars?! You’ve got worse, everything now is Uck this, Uck that, “ “If he looks at me again like that Bridge I swear he’ll be bloody croaking like a frog. Croaking full stop with my hands round his throat!”

“Sars! “ She formed an arch with her fingers looking at the guy. “Ucking wanker.! Yeah you! You can ucking hop it!” She fell about laughing. Bridget moved closer to her glanced past her to the unit in front of her. On it a bottle of rum.

“Oh you shite Sars!” She grabbed the bottle, went to move past her with it. Sarah grabbed it swigged back, the last of it and shoved it against her.”There yo, yooo, you can ucking have it.” Her words were slurred.

The producer had been summoned. Looking at Sarah and smelling her breath? “What the hell do you waaaaant. The only one thaaaas legless here, or will be, waaa waaa  be that ucking frog if that guy doesn’t stop looking at me like that! “ Her hand moving again.

Looking over to the guy. Shuffling nervously. “Yeah you you ucking wanker!” On seeing her trying to stand up only to stumble forward chairs shoved violently to one side with her almost falling over?

He, had made up his mind. “Call Rosalind, get her, out of my sight.”  He went to leave, stopped turned around to look back at her. “I catch you drunk again. You’re out of this; altogether! Oh and tell her from me, she’s not back in the production, until she apologizes to Arnold.” “Whooo the the the hell, isss Ar arrr arrrnold?!”  “The guy with the frog suit!”

The producer had left shaking his head. Dammit that guy Martin had a lot to answer for! He was deep in thought about, what the Martin had told him earlier in the week when they had met up?  After dragging it out of him re Miss Piggy?

He had looked at her, looked at the frog as he left them. Turning the corner, to burst out laughing. Miss Piggy and Kermit the frog? .Martin had had him in hysterics. At least one thing could be certain; Arnold in the frog suit, wouldn’t be taking his, rump, sausage and  two veg to her table!

Still, he could never understand, how Torens could love her so much. Who the hell in their right mind,  would want to spend their life, with some drunken, cussing, paranoid, aggessive..

He shook his head. He, had only taken her on for this, because, he owed Torens, several favours, when some of his audio equipment had failed and T had come to the rescue!

Rosalind, could play her part, for the next couple of nights. If she didn’t kiss and make up, he started to grin, ‘kiss the frog’ at least he wouldn’t be losing Arnold from turning into a prince anytime soon..

Ah Miss ucking Piggy.. One thing was certain, he would not be giving in where she was concerned. He would give her the chop! He fell about laughing. Trotters and all! Ah the tale that he had been told.. male to male over a rum.. he shook his head he could smell the rancid breath that had stank of rum.

Martin? Working one night, as usual; late, nothing new there. Was walking from his office past several others, supposedly empty? A noise from one of them, peeked his curiosity, had had had him QUIETLY, open the door. Given the sounds from within he reasoned that was probably a good idea?

Voyeur in him coming to the fore, well we won’t mention the word ‘coming’. He had eased the door open, to peer around the door to now see Sarah!

Straddled across him, who we will not, at this moment in time EXPOSE; though it can be said, there was certainly a lot ‘EXPOSED’ !

Mr Piggy who was enjoying, the slap of his hand, across her rump. "So Mr Piggy." She hisses. "Tell me why you're such a pig when it comes to
Miss Piggy."

"Cos you're never boar-ing." He snorted again as she shifts to move under him, her legs wrapped around him, the stilettos against his back, with him now taking his rump,  sausage and two veg, to the table.

"Oh hell, you know I love, the feel of your trotters ...... “

Watching him leave, Bridget had to stop her sticking her fingers up at him. It would be some time later, she had got her back to her apartment. The door opened, she crashed in, the door slammed open against the wall, the one that had a number of dents in it...

Cursing as she caught her arm against the wooden slats on the storage units. Closing the door, Bridge supported her to the sofa, sat her down. No bloody way was she going to help her up those stairs to bed! She could sleep there.

Luckily, it would not be long, before  Sarah was snoring her head off. “Hell you can snore Sars.”  She made some tea, sat down to glance at the coffee table. The laptop. Well she could use that to check her emails. Minutes later the screen lit up. A picture of that guy from the Caribbean. What was his name? She had seen him in the Drum with Sarah.

Overhearing the conversation, when Sarah had gone to a section in the store between two guys stood at the counter. Customers, Buying something. One of them had looked over at Sarah, he was saying something to his mate. Bridget moved closer though trying not to make it too obvious. He grinned.

“The blonde chick, bangs like a Caribbean wikka!” “Never mind that bro, man she look like one!”  He winked at his mate. “Never been fussy! Any port in a storm eh?!” “Well, they get plenty of this in the Carribbean!” He gyrated his hips shoving them forward, his hand making gestures.. singing lines from the Bob Marley song. “I wanna dance wit you baby .. “
They both fell about laughing. Bridge was going to say something, when one of them picked up his bag and they both left.

The sales guy, behind the counter, looked at her. “Don’t you go taking any notice of them.” “They got no manners. No manners talking like that.” She was relieved to leave there. Meeting up with Torens was a blessing in disguise.

“You have got to talk to her.” “No good me doing that. She never listens to me, never has. Always does her own thing.” “Well the drinking has got to the level now where its affecting her work, her health. You still love her?”

“Of course I do Bridge, that will NEVER change, a bit like her and her drinking. ‘Nother glass of wine, ah go on then.” He paused to grin. “I swear, its the booze, that has her saying that aswell.”

Bridge looked at him, put her coffee cup on to the saucer. “Saying what?” “She finishes a sentence with ‘then’ “ He rattled off a few of the favorite tweets, the phrases. “Bloody hell. I’d never thought about it, but you’re right.” She started to smile.

“Reckon after she’s had a few. Told me to uck off the last time we met. After I’d spent the night. So I didn’t feel too bad about it. Cept of course, she had been drinking again. Mind you at least she didn’t pee herself this time.”

“Oh my!” Howls Bridget. “I remember that! But you think that was bad enough! The other evening we had finished a gig and she had been drinking. We left the place to finish loading the van up. Back doors closed ready to climb in the van and go?

She staggers over to the wall, leans against it, slides her knickers down and pees! I kid you not! Muttering ‘Oh uck I needed that Bridge!!’ Course the stupid mare was so ! She peed all over her knickers! Now that was NOT funny! She just pulled them up got in the van! Damm the van stank for days after!”

“Oh no, the best one, was that time, outside the club, when i turned up, thought it would be good to see her again, she was with you and a couple of others. Moved over to the wall, bent right over and puked.

Bloody hell, did she ever! But she was leaning so far forward her skirt had gone up and hell you could see everything of her G’string. Hell if sh had farted, it would have been ‘Air on a G string’.

Mind you, the only music was her Uggggh Ugggggh as she puked Damm her arse in the air, reminded me, of my trip to the Grand Canyon.. “

Interrupted by the guys, who, were making me grin however hard I tried NOT to. Taking the mick, with his comment,  “Bloody hell, that’s the tightest I’ve ever seen on an arse that big?! With those on her she must get paper cuts they’re so tight and thin!” His mate?  “Hell,I didn’t know, they made G’strings that big!”

“I thought I saw you! You did, didn’t you! You smacked one of the guys! “ Torens rubbed his jaw. Managed one on me before he went down like a piece of lead.

The other that had been taking the ! was too close behind him. Managed to get away.” “See you do care about her!” She finished her coffee. “You’ve got to do something!”

“That guy she’s seeing? “ “Cmon you know what she’s like. Anything to tick you off. You didn’t  help that time with her and that Lady Gaga performance. As for the American girl! What was her name?” “Gina.”

“Jeez I got my ears bent for weeks after that happened!” She shoved at him. “You didn’t help either. You b’stard! Coming around at 3 in the morning shagging her! Poor girl doesn’t know whether she’s coming or going. Coming being the operative word here! “

Torens, fell about laughing. Bridget had realized what she had said, she was NOT amused! “You can wipe that bloody smirk off your face and.” She hit out at him.

“Stop, bloody laughing! B’stard! I know you are as bad as each other but I wonder sometimes if YOU are, the reason she drinks so heavily!”

“No, why she drinks so heavily. is Sarah being Sarah and unless everything in life revolves around her and is to her benefit she’s not interested. Always has to prove me wrong, or do something, to show that she can be better at it and lousy at it.

Take her website. Amateur. That new pic for her tribute? Amateur, half hearted, as are most things she does.
Offered her help time after time and what does she do?

No, as you, know all too well Bridge, its Sarah about Sarah, uck off, I’m not interested. Again shows her for who she has become. A shadow of the girl I fell in love with.

Do you know, what really ticks me off? She treats me like I’m something she’s scraped off her shoe! So far this year? I’ve done three times the amount of work that she has and where is she?

Still, in that bloody circle of hers, cept this time, its pantomime. The right bloody place, if you ask me. What is it she always says? Never mind that or that, I’ll get AROUND to it sometime!

Yeah that says it all. AROUND. in her CIRCLE.

To be continued